My physician clients are really good at helping their patients, being great leaders, putting their work schedule before their family and their own needs. But what they find so often happens is that at some point they feel the burden (physically and emotionally) of always making themselves last.
One of my Doctor Moms feels that as soon as she comes home, she needs to address the kids needs, so she puts off exercising or some alone/quiet time just for her to decompress from her stressful day. She feels "guilty" when she is doing something for herself and not for the important people in her life. But what she is starting to realize is that when she takes care of herself, she is actually taking care of her family indirectly. Because when she feels calm, relaxed and happy, her family benefits immensely. But when she is not feeling well and is tired, stressed, feeling guilty and not taking care of her mind, body and soul, everyone else is negatively impacted by that energy that she is putting out.
Another client of mine is a Hospitalist. There is a lot of politics going on in that hospital (which I am sure is quite a common thing). Often he questions himself and the decisions he makes and it weighs on him because of what others are saying and thinking. However, he is actually quite a confident and caring doctor who is a great leader and is liked by much of his staff. However, that doubt that he feels and the questioning of his skills and actions is a form of stress that negatively impacts his overall happiness. In the past, he would put himself last when it came to scheduling his vacation and put all his staff and colleagues' needs ahead of his own. But now he realizes that in order to maintain that passion that drove him to be a physician in the first place, he needs to take care of himself first and do what makes him feel happy or brings him a form of relief. Yes, sometimes in "corporate" settings there are things that we do that we are not too thrilled with. But we have to become more aware of what our emotional guidance system is telling us, despite what is going on around us or what others expect of us. When you go with what feels right to you, you can never go wrong.
Putting yourself last is a sure path to being unhappy in life. And physicians ... this includes you as well. You need to start putting your needs at the top of your priority list.
Are you taking care of your health? Are you spending quality time with the ones you love? If you are single and don't spend a lot of time with others (besides patients and your colleagues), what would it take for you to add some "me" time to your schedule? What would you love to do, if you could (which you can), that would add some more joy to your life? Whatever that is ... start incorporating that into your day. Don't know how that's going to happen? Contact me ... I help my physician clients with this all the time and they are much better off as a result of putting their personal needs first!
Being happy is a choice. And when you choose to be happy and ensure that you are taking care of you first, your personal health and well-being will improve.
Don't make BURNOUT be your story. You have a choice. DECIDE TODAY that you are worth it and it is time to make a change!
Life Coaching for Doctors: Prevent Physician Burnout!
